Once upon a time there was a young girl.  Her name was Johanna and she had...
THE RUNNIEST NOSE EVER.
She woke up every morning with....
A RUNNY NOSE
She sat in Math with a...
RUNNY NOSE
She even talked to her friends with a...
RUNNY NOSE

Johanna found that as long as her nose ran constantly, she would be regarded as socially awkward and unable to keep friends, or even get a job. Perhaps there was a solution. Yes, Johanna would travel far and wide to look for it.
One day Johanna happened upon an old abandoned hospital. She, with her nose running terribly, pushed opened the large wooden doors.  
A young man sat at the receptionist's desk, smiling largely at the mostly empty room.
The paint was peeling off the walls, and he seemed to be the only other living soul around.
The attendant continued to smile awkwardly as Johanna approached the desk, the only movement he made was to follow her with his eyes.
"I seek the holder of the cure," she stammered out, shivering in the chilly foyer.
The attendant rose to his feet and beckoned for her to follow.  Together they crossed the hall to a small gated elevator. Entering the rickety box, Johanna managed her first clear look at the man. His skin was pale. and his eyes were dark. In fact, his pallid white skin blended so well with his unifo- HE WASN'T BREATHING! Johanna's blood ran col in her veins, she tried to leave the elevator, but the door slammed shut at her first movement. she turned as the box began to descend, to see only the smiling face of her asphyxiated captor. He was still smiling. The last of the light from the foyer, was diminishing, in a clear cut beam across his eye..his lifeless eyes.
Johanna closed her eyes tight and waited for him to attack, instead of feeling any number of horrible instruments of death, she simply felt the elevator stop, and felt the room open around her. She opened her eyes to a dark, rusted hallway, lined with doors. Each door had no markings, but a dozen hands reaching through the door. They weren't moving, but they were all starched white.
Johanna set out down the middle of the hallway, without making a sound.
Slowly, quietly, as she walked, she began to hear a murmuring from down the hall. She quickened her pace, but no matter how fast she moved, the muttering inly got louder. It got louder and louder and louder until, Tears streaming, and nose running, Johanna heard it stop.
The resulting silence however, was louder than anything she had never heard before. The pure pressure of the noiseless vacuum and the pressing darkness forced Johanna into a ball on the ground. She cried out "I only seek to cure this curse!"
Silence. She lay there in silence for seven minutes and twenty five seconds before, she heard the muttering again, more audible than before.
Down the hallway she ran, until the reached a door..the only door to which the hallway could possibly lead.
She put her hand on the knob, and immediately felt a tug, a tug that reached so deep into her, it felt as if  it had grabbed her soul. She turned to find herself in a dimly lit room...Thats where she found me you see...rocking back and forth on the balls of my heels, whistling my dainty little tune of woe.. In fact many have found me, and asked for what i held...but none of them had truly sought it. This one however, she asked for my help. She said" i seek to cure my runny no-" she never got the last word out however..heh heh....
I was on my way across the room in less than a second...i Bopped her right on her runny nose.. I BROKE ITS MOTHERFUCKIN LITTLE NOSE LEGS!!!11!111
Now her nose would never run again, it wouldn't dare to..
She awoke the next morning, back in her room, in her bed with her cured nose. She now had...THE DRIEST NOSE EVER!

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